Fly the really, really, really friendly skies

I don’t know. I’m looking at photos of this little plane in which couples can fly over Vegas and join the mile high club, and I have questions.

The owner of this mile-high-club business, Andy Johnson, says on his site you have privacy in this little Cessna 421, and the pilot has noise-canceling headphones to assure you of more privacy.

But the pilot won’t peek back there? OK, fine. I guess paranoia is in the mind of the bewildered. Also, I imagine many people want the pilot to look and hear. Because that’s how a lot of people I know are.

Then there’s the question of how bouncy this ride is going to be. I mean, small plane. Right?

My final question: What kind of hunter are you? Hear me out.

I don’t hunt animals. But I understand there’s the hunter who goes out in the wilderness and slyly tracks prey by covering himself in animal urine and waiting for hours and pouncing.

Then there are hunters like sillypants Ted Nugent, the kinds of hunters who hunt animals that live inside fenced or bordered areas. Such “high fence hunting” doesn’t seem as sporting to me.

What I’m getting at is this: Renting a little Cessna for the purpose of joining the mile high club sounds to me like Ted Nugent-ish easy pickings.

However, sometimes easy pickings is what you want, like microwaving a burrito.

And it’s still a good business idea. I am quite sure people have relations in Cessnas all the time. But this one has a bed.

It’s pretty tough to beat a bed.

Cost: $800 (40 minute flight) up to $1,300 (90 minutes), plus an optional $200 roses-and-chocolates-and-champagne blah-blah.

You have to be 18 to fly this ride on The Love Cloud Aircraft’s “Golden Eagle” out of North Las Vegas Airport (lovecloudvegas.com).

Johnson (the guy’s name is Johnson? Really?) told the Weekly his Virginia-based flight school did get busted by the Feds once, and he spent 20 days in jail for flying “carelessly and heedlessly in willful or wanton disregard of the rights or safety of others,” which he blamed on a series of things.

But if you’re interested in a bed in back of van, I mean a Cessna, this guy thinks he has a deal for you.