Ruff Day

Translated from hip slang to stodgy English, the word refers to a "companion" or "friend" -- paws, wet noses and a fascination with each others' fannies notwithstanding.

That makes Sunday Dawg Day Afternoon.

"They're judging purebreds and mixed breeds and some pretty funny-looking dogs," says Dale Wynn, co-chair of Sunday's Best in Show -- starring canines from the Lied Animal Shelter -- at the Orleans Arena.

"These dogs are not trained at all. They're paraded around the ring after they've all had a bath and you can see they feel like stars. It's such a special day, because they go from having to be in a shelter hoping to be adopted to being in the middle of an arena. When you see their faces, you can tell they feel special that day."

Pitched somewhere between the American Kennel Club's serious, snouts-in-the-air pooch parade and filmmaker Christopher Guest's sly docu-satire, this Best in Show will showcase around 60 shelter dogs competing to be crowned King Canine, their merits assessed by official Kennel Club judges. Then post-show, they'll all be available for adoption.

The doggie beauty pageant -- without, we assume, any barked-out comments about how their guilty pleasure is pizza and their cherished hope is for world peace -- will feature the familiar sight of them led around the arena in full-prance, looking just as eager as if they were chasing chewed-up tennis balls in the park.

"We're leaning a bit more toward the funny movie because you're dealing with shelter dogs, but we brought in the AKC judges to make it a little toward the dog show, too," says Wynn, also the chairman of the board of the Animal Foundation. "We want to provide a fun day, but the biggest thing is to increase awareness of the shelter. We are still getting in 50,000 animals a year."

Proceeds benefit the shelter -- last year's show raised more than $25,000 -- and guests Robin Leach, Louie Anderson and Zowie Bowie will be on hand, while "Spamalot" star John O'Hurley assumes hosting duties.

"We'll probably walk away with one, I know this is going to happen," says O'Hurley, a mutt lover to the max. "I think it's wonderful, since I'm so tied to dogs."

Tied? More like collared and leashed. O'Hurley is the author of "It's OK To Miss the Bed on the First Jump: And Other Life Lessons I Learned from Dogs" and its companion volume, "Before Your Dog Can Eat Your Homework, First You Have To Do It: Life Lessons from a Wise Old Dog to a Young Boy." The books -- the latter written in the voice of his own dog, a white Maltese named Scoshi, that leaves him little notes -- dispense woof-woof wisdom on such topics as valuing time with loved ones and greeting each new day with enthusiasm.

"I didn't learn from Phil and Oprah, I learned from my dogs," O'Hurley says. "Dogs have no sense of time, they live in the present moment -- they know now and they know never and that's it. As humans, a lot of the source of our stress is dealing with past regrets or future needs, rather than looking each other straight in the eye and dealing with each other in the moment. Dogs do that naturally, and it's one of the things they teach us."

Courtesy of his canine, O'Hurley also gleaned that simple motives yield great pleasures. "I wrote in the first book about me being one of the worst runners in the world, always coming in last in all the races," he says. "I never had the stamina, never conditioned myself, so I never progressed and was content at the end of the pack." But observing his springer spaniel put the spring back in his sprint.

"One day, I watched her and she ran for the pure enjoyment of running. You threw a ball and she'd chase after it for hours. I said to myself, 'She loves to run and I don't, and yet I do.' So I thought, 'Tomorrow, I'm just going to change my thoughts completely,' and I ran at the head of the pack for three-quarters of the race and fell back toward the middle of the pack, where I finished. And my coach, if I'd grown a head out of my back, he wouldn't have been more surprised."

As the expression goes, out of the mouths of kibble-gobbling, tail-wagging, ball-chasing babes. ... So why not wise up and get such a sweet, life-loving sage for yourself?

Featuring a blend of purebreds (poodles, a German shepherd, an Australian shepherd and a Chihuahua, among others) and mixed breeds, the Lied Shelter's Best in Show also will include a "puppy parade" and canine contestants categorized as "Smedium" (small and medium-size dogs) and "Marge" (you guessed it -- medium and large-size dogs). But here, especially for potential adoptive families, pedigree is second to lovability.

"Two years ago, the dog chosen was just this crazy mix of dog with the happiest face and really pulled in the crowd," says Wynn, adding that the shelter's unique spin on Best of Show has drawn inquiring calls from animal organizations in other cities. "We've gotten calls from New York and San Francisco," she says. "We hope someday to have this on Animal Planet."

The late Gilda Radner captured the spirit of humankind's best bud when she said: "Dogs are the most amazing creatures. They give unconditional love. For me, they are the role model for being alive."

You know it, dawg.

Contact reporter Steve Bornfeld at sbornfeld@reviewjournal.com or 702-383-0256.