MOVIES
OPENING THIS WEEK
ALIENS IN THE ATTIC
"High School Musical" alumna Ashley Tisdale leads a group of kids against extra-terrestrials invading their vacation home in this family-friendly comedy featuring former "Saturday Night Live" regulars Kevin Nealon and Tim Meadows in the cast. At multiple locations. (86 min.) PG; action violence, suggestive humor, profanity.
THE COLLECTOR
A financially strapped ex-con (Josh Stuart) plots a heist at his new employer's country home, not realizing that another crook has already staked it out -- and rigged it with deadly traps. Seen "Saw," anyone? Screenwriters Patrick Melton and Marcus Dunstan have, because they also co-wrote the fourth, fifth and sixth "Saw" sequels -- and are in development on the seventh. At multiple locations. (88 min.) R; pervasive sadistic bloody violence, profanity, sexual situations, nudity.
FUNNY PEOPLE
Follow this link for the full review (page 27 in the January 31st Neon).
STREET DREAMS
An aspiring skateboard star (Paul Rodriguez Jr.) who dreams of going pro clashes with his parents, cops who have it in for him -- and a mentor who becomes his worst enemy -- when he runs away to Tampa to compete in an amateur skating competition. Former "Jackass" regular Ryan Dunn and "Rob & Big's" Rob Dyrdek (who co-scripted) co-star for director Chris Zamoscianyk. At multiple locations. (88 min.) R; pervasive profanity, crude sexual content, teen drinking.
VALENTINO: THE LAST EMPEROR
If you associate the Valentino name with the legendary silent screen idol, think again -- this documentary focuses on the legendary Italian designer Valentino, and how the fashion industry changed in the 50 years he reigned over the world of haute couture, with such fellow fashion giants as Giorgio Armani and Karl Lagerfeld. In English, Italian and French with English subtitles. At Village Square. (96 min.) PG-13; nudity, profanity.
ALREADY IN THEATERS
Movies are rated on a letter-grade scale, from A to F. Opinions by R-J movie critic Carol Cling (C.C.) are indicated by initials. Other opinions are from wire service critics.
ANGELS & DEMONS
(C+) Yes, it's better than "The Da Vinci Code." But that doesn't make director Ron Howard's bid for cinematic absolution good. Tom Hanks (shorn of his distracting "Da Vinci" tresses, but, thankfully, not his sense of humor) returns as Harvard symbologist Robert Langdon, who's called to the Vatican to stop a clandestine sect's deadly terrorist plot before all Rome goes kablooey. Unlike the too-talky "Da Vinci," this sequel does nothing but run and gun, yet far too many sequences that should keep you on the edge of your seat elicit a been-there, seen-that shrug. (138 min.) PG-13; violence, disturbing images, mature themes. (C.C.)
AWAY WE GO
(B) A young couple expecting their first child ("The Office's" John Krasinski, "Saturday Night Live" alumna Maya Rudolph) hit the road to connect with friends and family -- and find the perfect place to start their own family -- in an amiably oddball odyssey that winds from Arizona to Wisconsin to Florida -- and Canada. It's a (welcome) change of pace for Oscar-winning "American Beauty" director Sam Mendes (who probably needed one after last year's anguished "Revolutionary Road"); Krasinski's and Rudolph's unassuming performances help make this the first Mendes movie that feels lived-in rather than staged. (98 min.) R; profanity, sexual content.
BLOOD: THE LAST VAMPIRE
(D) No bite: In this adaptation of a Japanese animé, a vampire (Gianna Jun) who's part of a clandestine government agency hunts down demons in post-World War II Japan. This tedious, amateurish outing loses all charm in the transition to live action; French director Chris Nahon strains to connect low budget and high ambition, but his talent for atmosphere is repeatedly undermined by Chris Chow's incoherent script. (91 min.) R; strong bloody stylized violence.
BRÜNO
(B-) "Borat's" Sacha Baron Cohen returns as another outrageous character: the title Austrian fashionista, who's "schwartzlisted" at home, prompting an international odyssey, from Hollywood to the heartland, in search of fabulousness and fame. Once again, the deadpan Baron Cohen proves an equal opportunity offender, using his comic assaults to puncture the pretensions -- and the prejudices -- of those he encounters. Not quite the satirical thunderbolt "Borat" proved, "Brüno" has an inescapable been-there, seen-that undercurrent, yet it's still another defiantly un-PC (and frequently hilarious) exercise in excess. (83 min.) R; pervasive strong and crude sexual content, graphic nudity, profanity. (C.C.)
DINOSAURS 3D: GIANTS OF PATAGONIA
(B) If you like dinosaurs (and who doesn't?), you'll love this 3-D documentary, which follows paleontologist Rodolfo Coria as he tramps the rugged wilds of Patagonia (southern Argentina), where remains of the largest dinosaurs in the world -- including the 120-foot Argentinosaurus -- have been discovered. The perfect blend of scholarly information and totally cool dinosaurs brought to vivid life. (40 min.) G; scary dinosaurs.
DRAG ME TO HELL
(B) "Spider-Man" director Sam Raimi returns to his horror roots in this tale of a perky bank loan officer (a game Alison Lohman), ordered to evict an old woman (Lorna Raver) from her home, who falls victim to a supernatural curse. Justin Long and David Paymer co-star in this Raimi-esque mix of gross-out madness and sick laughs, which turns out to be a hell of a lot of fun -- in a sick and twisted way, of course. (99 min.) PG-13; horror violence, terror, disturbing images, profanity.
EVERY LITTLE STEP
(B) Real-life dancers audition for a Broadway revival of "A Chorus Line" -- which, of course, is all about dancers auditioning for a Broadway show. But what a show: this exuberant documentary also explores the singular sensation that the original production became, through archival footage and interviews with (among others) composer Marvin Hamlisch, dancer Donna McKechnie and late great director/choreographer Michael Bennett. Even if you've never seen "A Chorus Line," this companion piece to one of America's most beloved musicals taps universal longings that make it accessible to anyone who needs a job, needs to dance, needs to dream. (96 min.) PG-13, profanity, sexual references.
FOOD INC.
(B+) It's not a pretty picture, but this documentary presents an essential one, exploring American agribusiness and its impact on our food supply. From high fructose corn syrup to E coli, director Robert Kenner (PBS' "The American Experience") presents a blistering indictment of giant food conglomerates; it's about a subtle as a watermelon in a bowl of Cheerios, but Kenner's not trying to be objective. He's out to scare people -- parents with young children, low-income families who depend on fast foods to get by, politicians, food safety officials, all of us -- and he succeeds. (93 min.) PG; thematic material, disturbing images.
G-FORCE
(C) Specially trained animal spies (including those voiced by Tracy Morgan, Sam Rockwell and Oscar-winners Nicolas Cage and Penélope Cruz) battle a diabolical billionaire (Bill NIghy) with world domination on his mind in a humdrum, kid-friendly hybrid of "Mission: Impossible" and "The Wind in the Willows" that's an inane perpetual-motion machine of car chases (and motorized exercise ball chases), projectile kitchen appliances, and, yes, a towering "Transformers"-like robot run amok. Good thing the 9-inch-tall furball action heroes are actually computer-animated, because real rodents wouldn't have lasted through the opening minutes. Grown-ups in the audience may not either. (88 min.) PG; mild action, rude humor.
THE HANGOVER
(C) A wild Caesars Palace bachelor bash spells trouble for four pals (Bradley Cooper, Zach Galifianakis, Ed Helms, Justin Bartha) who party so hard they can't remember anything from the night before -- including where they left the groom. "Old School" director Todd Phillips' rude, crude 'n' lewd romp provides a perfect excuse for anyone who wants to laugh his (or her) ass off; if you'd rather laugh your head off, however, you'll have to find another movie, because this one's pretty much brainless, and proudly so. (99 min.) R; pervasive profanity, sexual content, nudity, drug material. (C.C.)
HARRY POTTER AND THE HALF-BLOOD PRINCE
(B) Harry (Daniel Radcliffe) enters his sixth year of training in wizardry -- and discovers an old book that helps him delve into the dark past of the villainous Lord Voldemort (Ralph Fiennes). Slower and talkier than the five Potters that came before -- but not necessarily in a bad way -- this is a bubbling cauldron of adolescent angst, rife with romance and heartbreak, jealousy and longing. If it weren't for all the bearded wizards and whooshing Death Eater vapor trails, this could be just another modern-day high school melodrama. (153 min.) PG; scary images, violence, profanity, mild sensuality.
THE HURT LOCKER
(A-) Three members of an Army bomb-defusing squad --a cocky sergeant (Jeremy Renner), his steady second-in-command (Anthony Mackie) and a scared-spitless rookie (Brian Geraghty) -- hit the streets of Iraq hoping to save lives, including their own. In this riveting action drama, one of the year's best movies, director Kathryn Bigelow ("Point Break," "K-19: The Widowmaker") demonstrates her mastery of action (and psychology), exploring how dehumanizing -- and how addictive -- combat can be. (131 min.) R; war violence, profanity. (C.C.)
ICE AGE: DAWN OF THE DINOSAURS
(C) Yawn of the dinosaurs: The third prehysteric adventure in the "Ice Age" franchise is definitely not the charm, as computer-animated pals Manny, Ellie, Diego and Sid (alias Ray Romano, Queen Latifah, Denis Leary and John Leguizamo -- or at least their voices) have definitely overstayed their welcome, despite a move to Jurassic-like surroundings. Despite the imaginative imagery (and effective 3-D), the depth of these effects make the flatness of the story (and the indifferent voicework) all the more obvious. (94 min.) PG; mild rude humor and peril.
I LOVE YOU, BETH COOPER
(D+) After a nerdy valedictorian (Paul Rust) proclaims his love for the title high school hottie ("Hero's" Hayden Panetierre) during his graduation speech, she shows up at his door, determined to make his grad night one to remember. Alas, this insipid-yet-raunchy wannabe farce never gets close to unmasking its high school stereotypes -- and the charmlessness of the central characters make it all the more difficult to endure. In other words, we hate you, "Beth Cooper." (102 min.) PG-13; crude and sexual content, profanity, teen drinking, drug references, brief violence.
LAND OF THE LOST
(C-) Wasteland of the lost: A crackpot scientist (Will Ferrell), believing time travel can solve the world's fossil fuel shortage, zaps himself back in time in a (very) loose adaptation of the '70s kid TV favorite that wastes Ferrell's comedic talents and exemplifies the current Hollywood formula: big over small, special effects over story and excess, excess, excess. Some movies are good stupid; this one's just plain stupid, and that's not good. (93 min.) PG-13; crude and sexual content, profanity, drug references.
MOON
(B) Back in Las Vegas following its debut at June's CineVegas film festival, this deceptively simple study of alienation, paranoia, and loneliness focuses on Sam (a virtuoso Sam Rockwell), an astronaut nearing the end of a three-year lunar stint. In his feature debut, director Duncan Jones (son of Mr. "Space Oddity" himself, David Bowie) conjures a hauntingly ominous tone, building a strange empathy -- conspiratorial, tinged with dread -- in the dialogues between Sam and his computer, voiced by the appropriately named Kevin Spacey. (97 min.) R; profanity.
MY SISTER'S KEEPER
(C) A young girl ("Little Miss Sunshine's" Abigail Breslin) conceived as a genetic match for her cancer-stricken sister (Sofia Vassilieva) rebels against her parents (Cameron Diaz, Jason Patric). The "Notebook" team of director Nick Cassavetes and co-writer Jeremy Leven reunites for this moving yet slick adaptation of Jodi Picoult's book, which captures the profound sorrow and grim realities of a dying child -- but also strikes the prettified tone of a sympathy card. (106 min.) PG-13; mature themes, disturbing images, sexual references, profanity, brief teen drinking.
NIGHT AT THE MUSEUM: BATTLE OF THE SMITHSONIAN
(B-) History repeats itself, in more ways than one, in this sequel to the 2006 hit. This time, former night guard turned gadget guru Larry Daley (Ben Stiller) discovers that the friends who came to life after hours at New York's Museum of Natural History are destined for mothballs at the Smithsonian Institution in Washington, D.C., setting the stage for a rescue mission that finds spunky pilot Amelia Earhart (Amy Adams) helping battle power-crazed pharaoh Kahmunrah (the sublimely silly Hank Azaria). Not much movie magic beyond the computer-generated effects, but it's still an occasionally clever, frequently funny and generally lively adventure. (105 min.) PG; mild action, brief profanity. (C.C.)
ORPHAN
(B) After losing yet another baby, John and Kate Coleman (top-shelf actors Peter Sarsgaard and Vera Farmiga) decide to adopt 9-year-old Esther (the terrifically creepy Isabelle Fuhrman), who's hardly a bundle of joy. This thoroughly enjoyable addition to the venerable, mostly forgotten devil-spawn genre (think 1956's "The Bad Seed" and 1972's "The Other") proves there's plenty of life in the old demon-seed plotline. (123 min.) R; disturbing violent content, sexual situations, profanity.
THE PROPOSAL
(B-) A bitch-on-wheels book editor (Sandra Bullock) who's about to be deported drafts her browbeaten assistant (Ryan Reynolds) as her instant fiancé, only to get her fish-out-of-water comeuppance when they visit his folks in rugged Alaska. This genial romantic comedy may utterly predictable and eminently forgettable, but the charmingly deft cast -- including Betty White as a go-for-the-gusto grandma -- proves such good company you might not care. (108 min.) PG-13; sexual content, nudity, profanity. (C.C.)
PUBLIC ENEMIES
(C+) Motion, not emotion: Johnny Depp goes gangster, playing dapper Depression-era hood John Dillinger to "Dark Knight" Christian Bale's straight-arrow G-man Melvin Purvis in director Michael Mann's rat-a-tat action workout. Too bad it's so overstuffed with bank jobs and shootouts there's little room for character development, let alone reflection. But at least it looks great, and a few supporting players strike sparks, especially "La Vie en Rose" Oscar-winner Marion Cotillard as Dillinger moll Billie Frechette and Mann's "Crime Story" co-star Stephen Lang as a gun-totin' lawman who knows how to get the job done. (140 min.) R; gangster violence, profanity. (C.C.)
STAR TREK
(B) A blast from the past (and a blast, period), this relaunch of the venerable Starship Enterprise delivers, saluting Gene Roddenberry's original without embalming its best qualities. Actionmeister J.J. Abrams ("Lost") breaks no new ground, but shakes the mission free of numbing nostalgia, while a near-perfect cast (Chris Pine as hot-headed, hot-blooded James T. Kirk, "Heroes' " Zachary Quinto as young Spock, Karl Urban as Dr. Leonard "Bones" McCoy, Simon Pegg as Scotty -- and, inevitably, Leonard Nimoy as time-warped Spock Prime) does the rest. (126 min.) PG-13; sci-fi action and violence, brief sexual content. (C.C.)
THE TAKING OF PELHAM 123
(C+) Money train: A regular-guy dispatcher (Denzel Washington) matches wits with a criminal mastermind (John Travolta) who hijacks a New York subway car and promises to start slaughtering the trapped passengers if $10 million isn't delivered within the hour. Travolta and Washington have a blast as the cat-and-mouse adversaries, but this remake of a 1974 thriller isn't quite as much fun as they are, in part because director Tony Scott's overheated, perpetual-motion visual style often distracts, and detracts, from the suspense he's trying (too) hard to create. (106 min.) R; violence, profanity. (C.C.)
TRANSFORMERS: REVENGE OF THE FALLEN
(C) Those nasty Decepticons are back, kidnapping hero Sam Witwicky (charismatic Shia LaBeouf) and setting the stage for another epic, duel-to-the-death battle with the good-guy Autobots to determine Earth's fate. Megan Fox, Josh Duhamel, Tyrese Gibson and John Turturro reprise their roles in this follow-up to the 2007 smash, which is bigger, longer and louder than its predecessor. In this case, more is definitely less, making this installment long on boom-boom-pow and short on boom-boom-wow! (147 min.) PG-13; intense sci-fi action violence, profanity, crude and sexual material, brief drug material.
THE UGLY TRUTH
(D+) Ugly is as "Ugly" does: A romantically challenged producer for a morning news show (in-a-rut charmer Katherine Heigl) clashes with her show's misogynistic new correspondent ("300's" mucho macho Gerard Butler), who tests his relationship theories on her. Crude yet cloying, this aptly titled battle-of-the-sexes comedy turns out to be a cynical, clumsy attempt to mate a chick flick with a male-oriented gross-out comedy; both sexes should sue for defamation of character. (101 min.) R; sexual content, profanity. (C.C.)
UP
(A-) Another winner from the folks at Pixar Animation, who make a whimsical leap to 3-D with this buoyant tale of an elderly widower (voiced by Ed Asner) and a stowaway kid (Jordan Nagai) who take to the skies -- in a house buoyed by balloons -- to explore exotic climes. Director Pete Docter ("Monsters, Inc.") directs with a sure-handed mixture of sentiment and slapstick, tapping into the magical connection between young and old -- and making this an ideal summer moviegoing treat for kids of all ages. (96 min.) PG; action and peril. (C.C.)
WHATEVER WORKS
(B+) Writer-director Woody Allen returns home to New York for this light, but far from slight, comedy about the unlikely romance between a misanthropic physicist ("Curb Your Enthusiasm's" Larry David, a kvetchy hoot) and a Mississippi runaway (deadpan Evan Rachel Wood), whose departure soon brings her mother (sensationally sly Patricia Clarkson) to the Big Apple. Allen once again shows off his trademark wit and his insightful view of human nature as he shifts between the seriously and the silly, creating yet another profound -- and profoundly funny -- exploration of what fools we mortals be. (92 min.) PG-13; sexual situations and references, brief nude images, mature themes. (C.C.)
X-MEN ORIGINS: WOLVERINE
(C+) Hugh Jackman returns as Marvel Comics' angry, adamantium-clawed title character in a prequel that explores how he's driven to join the for-mutants-only Weapons X program -- by the murderous back-stabbing of his lifelong brother-in-arms, Sabretooth (a smilingly sinister Liev Schreiber). The mega-buff Jackman gives it his all, but his appealing humanity can't overcome the overwrought tedium. (107 min.) PG-13; intense action and violence, partial nudity. (C.C.)
YEAR ONE
(D+) Banished from their primitive village, two lazy hunter-gatherers (Jack Black and Michael Cera) embark on an odyssey across the ancient world, where they encounter Old Testament characters and visit Sodom, where they must rescue members of their village from slavery. Despite the reliable names in front of and behind the camera (including director Harold Ramis and producer Judd Apatow), this is a dud of near-epic proportions. (100 min.) PG-13; crude and sexual content, brief profanity, comic violence.
