MOVIES
Movies are rated on a letter-grade scale, from A to F. Opinions by R-J movie critic Carol Cling (C.C.) are indicated by initials. Other opinions are from wire service critics.
Motion Picture Association of America ratings:
G - General audiences, all ages.
PG - Parental guidance suggested. Some material may not be suitable for children.
PG-13 - Parental guidance suggested. Some material may not be suitable for children under 13.
R - Restricted. Under 17 requires accompanying parent or guardian.
NC-17 - No one under 17 admitted.
NR - Not rated.
THE BAND'S VISIT
(B+) Strike up the band: The band is Egyptian, their music is distinctly national in spirit and the arid little hamlet that they have stumbled into en route to a gig is Israeli. But never fear; Israeli filmmaker Eran Kolirin's sly and bewitching chamber comedy underscores the decency of its characters while sidestepping the gooey, let's-join-hands imperative of its premise. In English (too much English to qualify for a foreign-film Oscar nomination), Hebrew and Arabic with English subtitles. (89 min.) PG; brief profanity.
THE BANK JOB
(B) In 1971 London, petty thieves (led by Jason Statham as a struggling mechanic and Saffron Burrows as his ex-model ex-flame) break into a Baker Street bank vault, unaware their record haul includes salacious photos incriminating a royal family member. It's a tangled web "The Bank Job" weaves, but under the crisp direction of Roger Donaldson ("No Way Out"), the movie keeps multiple plot threads tangle-free and multiple colorful characters in orbit -- until their various worlds collide. (111 min.) R; sexual content, nudity, violence, profanity. (C.C.)
THE BUCKET LIST
(C) Doing it to death: After sharing a hospital room during cancer treatment, a grouchy billionaire (Jack Nicholson) and a dignified mechanic (Morgan Freeman) share death-defying adventures during one last spree. Despite the dynamic duo of Nicholson and Freeman, Rob Reiner's languid pacing and hokey staging transform what might have been a touching meditation on life's fleeting wonders into a maudlin exercise in audience manipulation. (97 min.) PG-13; sexual references, profanity. (C.C.)
CHARLIE BARTLETT
(B-) After he's kicked out of yet another private school, a lonely, brainy rich kid ("Alpha Dog's" Anton Yelchin) goes slumming at the local public high school, where he becomes self-appointed psychiatrist (and prescription-pill supplier) for his new classmates. Not in the same league as "Pump Up the Volume," but an articulate script and an engaging supporting cast (led by Hope Davis as Charlie's oblivious mother and Robert Downey Jr. as his beleaguered principal) help keep the mildly satiric hits coming. (97 min.) R; profanity, drug use, brief nudity, brief violence. (C.C.)
COLLEGE ROAD TRIP
(D+) Phi beta krappa: Disney Channel star Raven-Symoné is Daddy's Little Girl heading off to college -- that is, if Daddy (Martin Lawrence), a maniacal, control-freak police chief, will let her go quietly. Alas, this crass, disposable comedy (also featuring a cameo by Donny Osmond) is so over-the-top that its sheer mindless excess is a borderline saving grace -- but not enough of one to save this movie, or us from it. (83 min.) G; all ages.
DEEP SEA 3-D
(B) Get up close and personal with ocean wildlife, unveiled in the reach-out-and-touch weirdness of Imax 3-D at the Luxor. This giant-screen documentary introduces exotic denizens of the deep so extravagantly extraterrestrial, nothing created by Hollywood's special effects labs could possibly compete. (40 min.) G; all ages.
DINOSAURS 3-D: GIANTS OF PATAGONIA
(B+) Now at Luxor's Imax theater, this excursion traces the evolution -- and extinction -- of giant prehistoric beasts that rip each other's faces off in thrilling computer-generated segments showcasing species we didn't see in "Jurassic Park." (40 min.) NR; very large, very loud dinosaurs.
DOOMSDAY
(D+) Natural selection means survival of the hottest in a flamboyantly silly post-apocalyptic thriller with a heavy debt to "The Road Warrior." Rhona Mitra is a glam fighting gal who leads the charge after a dreaded virus resurfaces in a long-quarantined city, prompting an elite team to go after a cure by any means necessary. (105 min.) R; strong bloody violence, profanity, sexual content/nudity.
DRILLBIT TAYLOR
(C) Three desperate high school dweebs (Nate Hartley, Troy Gentile, David Dorfman) solicit a beach bum who claims to be an Iraq war veteran (Owen Wilson, very much in his comfort zone), hoping this budget bodyguard will protect them from a sadistic bully (Alex Frost). Watching the latest from the Judd Apatow hit machine (which brought you "The 40-Year-Old Virgin," "Knocked Up" and "Superbad") makes you feel as though your arm's being twisted on your way to class -- which is not a compliment. (102 min.) PG-13; crude, racy humor, profanity, drug references, violence, partial nudity.
THE EYE
(D+) Following a corneal transplant, a blind violinist (laughably miscast Jessica Alba) recovers her sight, but is tormented by strange, shadowy images, which may be her imagination -- or visions of a terrifying supernatural world. Alessandro Nivola and Parker Posey (let's hope they both got fat paychecks) co-star in a preposterous remake of a Hong Kong horror hit that was -- surprise! -- far more compelling before it got lost in translation. (97 min.) PG-13; violence/terror and disturbing content.
FOOL'S GOLD
(D+) Pure pyrite: "How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days" sweethearts Kate Hudson and Matthew McConaughey reunite for an "as-if" action romp about newly divorced couple on the trail of long-lost Spanish treasure. Donald Sutherland (as a globe-trotting billionaire), Ray Winstone (a rival treasure-hunter), Kevin Hart (a treasure-lusting rapper) and his henchmen (Malcolm Jamal-Warner, Brian Hooks) co-star; let's hope they all enjoyed their tropical trek, because the movie they brought back is a tedious waste of time -- especially yours. (112 min.) PG-13; action violence, sexual situations and references, brief nudity, profanity. (C.C.)
FUNNY GAMES
(C+) Austrian writer-director Michael Haneke ("Caché," "The Piano Teacher") serves up a shot-by-shot English-language remake of his 1997 breakthrough, about a vacationing couple (Naomi Watts, Tim Roth) terrorized by a pair of oh-so-polite psychos (Michael Pitt, Brady Corbet). Despite Haneke's rigorously intellectual approach, these horrific "Funny Games" emerge as another, artier example of "torture porn," proving a bit too enamored of the exploitation-like action the movie claims to explore. (112 min.) R; terror, violence, profanity. (C.C.)
THE HAMMER
(B) Jerry (Adam Carolla) has just said goodbye to his live-in girlfriend, his construction job and his 30s. So, naturally, he tries out for the Olympic boxing team. Like its hero, this comedy is basically a good-natured slob. In other words, it's no classic, but , unlike recent attempts at sports comedy (we're looking at you, "Semi-Pro"), it comes through by not seeming to try to hard. (90 min.) R; brief profanity.
HORTON HEARS A WHO
(B) Finally, a Dr. Seuss tale that won't make you wail! After live-action travesties "The Cat in the Hat" and "How the Grinch Stole Christmas," your faith will be restored by this charming computer-animated adaptation, about a helpful elephant (voiced by "Grinch's" Jim Carrey) trying mightily to protect a microscopic community from his judgmental jungle neighbors. Not as good as legendary animator Chuck Jones' delightful 1970 TV adaptation (what could be?), but vivid animation from the "Ice Age" folks and a top-chop vocal cast (also featuring Steve Carell, Carol Burnett, Seth Rogen and Charles Osgood) make this a true family treat. (88 min.) G; all ages. (C.C.)
IN BRUGES
(C+) Laurel-and-Hardy hit men -- one (Colin Farrell) forever getting into not-so-fine messes, the other (Brendan Gleeson) stuck with cleaning them up -- bide their time on an enforced vacation in the picturesque Belgian town of Bruges, awaiting further instructions from their rabid boss (Ralph Fiennes). Playwright-turned-director Martin McDonagh's off-kilter killers prove diverting, but in trying to balance twisted humor and explosive violence, McDonagh creates a wild yet only sporadically satisfying trip. (107 min.) R; strong bloody violence, pervasive profanity, sexual references, drug use. (C.C.)
JUMPER
(C-) A genetic glitch allows a young man (a sullen Hayden Christensen) to teleport himself anywhere, anytime -- and into a centuries-long war between the "jumpers" and their enemies -- in "Mr. and Mrs. Smith" director Doug Liman's sci-fi misfire. Rarely have so many humdrum digital effects and so much expensive location photography been lavished upon so many disagreeable characters (played by, among others, Samuel L. Jackson, Diane Lane and Rachel Bilson). They deserve better; so do we. (88 min.) PG-13; intense action violence, profanity, brief sexuality.
JUNO
(B) Major critical buzz (only some of it deserved) surrounds this witty comedy-drama, from screenwriter du jour Diablo Cody, about a wisecracking high school misfit (a deadpan Ellen Page), pregnant by her boyfriend ("Superbad's" Michael Cera), who finds a seemingly perfect couple (Jason Bateman, Jennifer Garner) to adopt the baby. Mostly a delight, if a bit too self-consciously clever for its own good. Winner of one Academy Award: best original screenplay. (92 min.) PG-13; mature themes, sexual situations, profanity. (C.C.)
THE KITE RUNNER
(B-) An Afghan-born writer living in the U.S. ("United 93's" Khalid Abdalla) returns to his homeland to redeem a childhood act of betrayal in a hit-and-miss adaptation of Khaled Hosseini's novel that begins well but drags onward, and downward, as it shifts from past to present. In English and Dari, Pashtu, Urdu and Russian with English subtitles. (122 min.) PG-13; mature themes (including child rape), violence, brief profanity. (C.C.)
LIONS 3-D: ROAR OF THE KALAHARI
(B+) This award-winning National Geographic production, filmed in the wild by Tim Liversedge, goes 3-D, focusing on a lion king's battle with a young challenger for control of his throne -- and a valuable water hole in Botswana's Kalahari desert. (40 min.) NR; animal violence.
MEET THE BROWNS
(C) Laid off from her job, a struggling single mother from inner-city Chicago (Angela Bassett) heads to Georgia for a family funeral -- and discovers the down-home Southern relatives she never knew. In other words, it's more crowd-pandering cheer from the tireless Tyler Perry, the one-man entertainment factory who once again adapts and directs his own stage hit -- and reprises his cross-dressing role as the madcap, meddling Madea. (100 min.) PG-13; drug content, profanity, sexual references, mature themes, brief violence.
MISS PETTIGREW LIVES FOR A DAY
(B) In 1939 London, a starchy, newly unemployed governess ("Fargo" Oscar-winner Frances McDormand) stumbles into a job as companion to a madcap American singer ("Enchanted's" Amy Adams), and finds herself catapulted into a dizzying social whirl that transforms her from frump to late-blooming flower. Based on an all-but-forgotten '30s novel, this nostalgic Cinderella story is a jubilee for McDormand, a scandalously underutilized treasure in Hollywood, and jolly good fun for most everyone else. Including the audience. (92 min.) PG-13; partial nudity, innuendo. (C.C.)
MYSTERY OF THE NILE
(B+) This Imax documentary, now playing at the Luxor, chronicles the first descent of the Blue Nile from source to sea, a 3,250-mile, 114-day odyssey that brings explorers face-to-face with rapids, crocodiles, bandits, malaria, sandstorms and the fierce desert sun. (47 min.) NR; all ages.
NATIONAL TREASURE: BOOK OF SECRETS
(B-) Dauntless treasure hunter Benjamin Franklin Gates (Nicolas Cage) returns for more fractured history lessons and Indiana Jones-ing as he searches for 18 missing pages from the diary of Abraham Lincoln assassin John Wilkes Booth -- which could prove the key to an international conspiracy. Silly, breezy escapism with nothing on its mind but unpretentious fun. (124 min.) PG; action violence.
NEVER BACK DOWN
(C-) Extreme martial arts and dark family skeletons vie for center stage in an interminable "Karate Kid"-meets-"Fight Club" workout about a rebellious teen (Tom Cruise lookalike Sean Faris) who tangles with a popular rich kid (Cam Gigandet) at his new high school -- and seeks mixed martial arts training from a wise mentor (Djimon Hounsou). This hyperkinetic bash-a-thon leaves no cornball cliché unturned, proving the ancient adage: Stay away from movies with titles providing brainless macho advice. (110 min.) PG-13; mature themes involving intense fighting/violence, sexuality, partying and profanity, all involving teens. (C.C.)
THE OTHER BOLEYN GIRL
(B-) Historical hooey: In 16th-century England, two sisters from the powerful Boleyn family -- scheming Anne (Natalie Portman) and dreamy Mary (Scarlett Johansson) -- vie for the heart (and hot bod) of lusty, zesty King Henry VIII (Eric Bana) in an adaptation of Phillppa Gregory's best-selling bodice-ripper that suggests a Tudor-era combo of "Mean Girls" and "Desperate Housewives." OK as far as it goes -- which is not far enough. (115 min.) PG-13; mature themes, sexual content, violent images.
P.S. I LOVE YOU
(C+) A young widow (tearfully gallant Hilary Swank) tries to rebuild her life, following instructions left by her late husband ("300's" Gerard Butler). Swank's "Freedom Writers" director, Richard LaGravenese tries to cool down the mostly overheated farrago of sentiment, self-help and romantic cliché that marks this seven-hankie weepie featuring Gina Gershon, Kathy Bates, Lisa Kudrow (will someone please give this woman her own movie already?) and Harry Connick Jr. (126 min.) PG-13; sexual references, brief nudity.
PENELOPE
(B) Back in Las Vegas after its U.S. premiere at 2007's CineVegas film festival, this modern-day fairy tale focuses on a lovely young heiress (Christina Ricci), who's cursed with a pig's snout for a nose -- and an overbearing mother (Catherine O'Hara) anxious to marry her off to the first male blue blood ("Atonement's" James McAvoy) who can stand to be in the same room with her. Ah, but looks prove deceiving -- in all sorts of ways -- as this whimsical charmer demonstrates, at least to tween girls and soft-hearted romantics of all ages. (102 min.) PG; profanity, innuendo, mature themes. (C.C.)
SEMI-PRO
(C) Quibble and dribble: Once again, Will Ferrell drapes his goofy man-child persona in 1970s polyester as the owner-coach-power forward of an American Basketball Association franchise on its last legs. The setups are promising, but the payoffs are as flat as an airless red-white-and-blue ball, even with Woody Harrelson, André "3000" Benjamin, "ER's" Maura Tierney, Jackie Earle Haley and Ferrell's "Blades of Glory" co-stars Will Arnett, Rob Corddry and Andy Richter on the team. (90 min.) R; profanity, sexual content.
SHUTTER
(C) What "The Ring" did for videotapes and "Pulse" did for cell phones, "Shutter" tries to do for cameras, as this remake of a 2004 Thai shocker finds a young photographer (Joshua Jackson) and his new bride (Rachael Taylor) in Japan, where their vehicle suddenly plows into a young girl who appears out of nowhere and mysteriously vanishes again -- until her face begins appearing everywhere they go. Occasionally, the movie's banality works in its favor; most of the time, however, it merely works on your (rapidly disappearing) patience. (83 min.) PG-13; gruesome imagery, sexual themes.
SLEEPWALKING
(C) An 11-year-old girl ("Bridge to Terabithia's" AnnaSophia Robb) tries to cope with her mother's abandonment by forging a bond with her troubled uncle (Nick Stahl) in an inert, sloppily written melodrama that's as grim and featureless as its frozen Midwestern setting. Charlize Theron (in the second movie she's executive produced) plays an addled, self-centered mother --and she's riveting whenever she's on screen. When she's not, this movie begins to begins to act like its own title, even with Dennis Hopper in full-throttle overdrive as a grotesquely monstrous figure. (101 min.) R; profanity, violence.
THE SPIDERWICK CHRONICLES
(B-) After moving (unwillingly) to a rundown estate, twin brothers (one rebellious, one brainiac, both played by Freddie Highmore) and their plucky older sister (Sarah Bolger) battle hobgoblins, trolls and other assorted beasties lurking in the woods. This brisk adaptation of Tony DiTerlizzi and Holly Black's fantasy tales overdoes the computer-generated effects, but potent fractured-family themes, plus memorable turns by Nick Nolte (as the movie's resident monster), Mary-Louise Parker (as the kids' embattled mother) and David Strathairn (as the inquisitive scientist who started it all) make this an all-ages treat. (97 min.) PG; scary creature action and violence, peril, thematic elements. (C.C.)
STEP UP 2 THE STREETS
(C-) Been there, danced that: In this sequel to the 2006 sleeper, romantic sparks strike between a street dancer (Briana Evigan) and a new classmate (Robert Hoffman) at the Maryland School of the Arts. Less a sequel than a variation on a theme, this dance movie can move -- which is fortunate, because the rest of it, from the predictable class conflicts to sanitized keeping-it-real bluster, is too leaden to get off the ground. (98 min.) PG-13; profanity, sexual references, brief violence.
10,000 B.C.
(D+) A young mammoth hunter (Steven Strait) leads a warrior band through uncharted territory to secure his post-Ice Age tribe's future -- and save his sweetheart (Camilla Belle) -- in this tedious, ludicrous (but harmless) prehistoric epic from bombastic "Day After Tomorrow" director Roland Emmerich. It's a low-test "Apocalypto," minus Mel Gibson's gore-mongering and narrative drive. If only Emmerich took as much care with his human characters as with inanimate objects and CGI animals. (109 min.) PG-13; intense action and violence.
THERE WILL BE BLOOD
(A-) Writer-director Paul Thomas Anderson ("Magnolia") finally gets out of his own quirky way with an epic adaptation of Upton Sinclair's "Oil!" about the showdown between a budding oil baron (Oscar-winner Daniel Day-Lewis) and a neophyte preacher (Paul Dano) in early 20th-century California. A bit overlong and over-the-top, this gripping study of all-American greed and rapaciousness signals Anderson has finally struck gold -- black gold. Winner of two Academy Awards: best actor (Day-Lewis) and cinematography. (158 min.) PG-13; violence. (C.C.)
UNDER THE SAME MOON
(B) Carlitos (adorable Adrian Alonso), a bright 9-year-old living with his grandmother in their native Mexico while his mother (Kate del Castillo) toils as a Los Angeles maid, stows away in a U.S.-bound minivan driven by two students (Jesse Garcia and "Ugly Betty's" America Ferrera), launching a dauntless quest to reconnect with his mother. Patricia Riggen's rousing feature-directing debut, a hit at this year's Sundance film festival, shamelessly piles on the melodrama (along with everything else), but its heartfelt themes and even more heartfelt performances ultimately save the day. In English and Spanish with English subtitles. (109 min.) PG-13; mature themes. (C.C.)
UNTRACEABLE
(C-) Bringing new meaning to the term "Internet hit," an FBI agent Diane Lane) races against the clock to catch a psycho who displays his graphic murders online -- with visitors to the site determining how fast his captives die. Lane is, as always, fascinating, but this abhorrent cyberthriller exploits the inhumanity of torture as it cynically condemns Internet rubberneckers (and by extension, moviegoers) for watching it. (111 min.) R; strong gruesome violence, profanity.
VANTAGE POINT
(C+) You've gotta get a gimmick, and this topical thriller has one, exploring an apparent assassination and terrorist attack at an international summit from multiple perspectives, including those of Secret Service agents (Dennis Quaid, "Lost's" Matthew Fox), an American tourist (Forest Whitaker), a TV news producer (Sigourney Weaver) and the U.S. president (William Hurt) himself. Alas, once you've got a gimmicj you've gotta know what to do with it, and "Vantage Point" doesn't, forcing us to try and solve a puzzle with pieces that never fit. (90 min.) PG-13; intense violence and action, disturbing images, brief profanity. (C.C.)
