The good, bad and ugly of television news

Observing the Over-the-Air Gang:

Memo to Channel 5's John Huck: "Ginormous" isn't English, no matter how gigantic or enormous the stimulus package. ... Sophia Choi's easygoing maturity is News-3's biggest unheralded asset. Consider it heralded. ... Weather wizard Darren Peck is Fox-5's Prince of Poses, his every seconds-long modeling stance a potential Annie Leibovitz moment. Anyone ever tell him it's a TV weather report, not a GQ photo shoot? ...

Channel 5 told us a story based on an "alarming survey." Reminds us of Ellen DeGeneres' great TV news-mocking quip: "A disturbing study finds that studies are disturbing." ... Back to that adjective, they also reported a "disturbing murder" (as opposed to murders that aren't particularly disturbing). ...

Beyond tilt-a-whirl graphics, whoosh-whoosh sound effects and fly-by cuts by editors with apparent attention deficit disorder, can Channel 13 put it in 3-D IMAX, too? Gotta keep our eyeballs spinning counterclockwise. ... So lame-o is the promo of News-3's Kim Wagner nagging Angela Martin to rename herself Angela Wagner. How many Wagners need we wake up with? (Wait, don't answer that.) ...

Legislators working to grant gay couples equal benefits inspired Channel 8 to call it "empowering same-sex couples" and Channel 5 to exclaim that "lawmakers are looking for the next best thing" without legalizing gay marriage. Consider using more neutral language to declaw right-wingers railing over that gosh-darn (sorry for my potty mouth) liberal media. ...

Channel 5's 5:30 news calls itself "your only choice for local news right now." Isn't it a "choice" only if there's more than one option? ... Channel 3, kindly curb those close-ups of people's waddling fannies and walking feet. Viewers aren't fetishists. (I know because I'm one and they're never at the meetings.) ...

Snappiest set: Channel 8's high-tech, multidimensional sprawl of monitors, newsroom backdrops, pastel hues and floating graphics: understated when it could have been overblown. ... Channel 13's Ben Deci constructed a nicely nuanced narrative, allowing participants to tell the tale of a beloved dog mistakenly euthanized at Lied Animal Shelter, its owner arriving 30 minutes too late. Their words broke more hearts than a reporter's ever could. ...

Reading a story on bench-warrant moratoriums, Channel 13's Lisa Remillard proved she's not into robotic regurgitation of sloppy scriptwriting. To the camera, from the monitor: "If you've got an outstanding bench warrant in North Las Vegas, you're in luck." To her co-host, off the cuff: "How can you be in luck if you've got a bench warrant?" Amen, sister. ...

Congrats to Edward R. Murrow regional award winners: Channel 3 for sports reporting (a piece on a swimmer in the Para-Olympics) and Channel 8 for its Web site (LasVegasNow.com). ...

King-size kudos to Channel 8's George Knapp for nailing a Peabody Award, an honor of ginormous proportions. ...

Yo, John: Now it's English.

Contact reporter Steve Bornfeld at sbornfeld@reviewjournal.com or 702-383-0256.